Hot Date this Valentine's Day

When I say I'm in love, you best believe I'm in love....L.U.V.
I met her at the liquor store. She works for a direct marketing company, and she's beautiful - I mean stunningly beautiful. There I was browsing the rum selection, and she asked me if she could borrow $0.13 - she didn't have quite enough for the bottle of hooch she was buying and the clerk was being a hard ass about it. Anyway, we started talking about various crap and we really hit it off. I pretended to know about a TV show she likes and she pretended to know where Ottawa is. I've talked to her on the phone a few times since then and we're going out a week from tonight.....lots of pressure, and I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop....I mean is she an ex-con? Does she have a drug problem? Has she got 4 different kids from 4 different baby-daddies? I don't know, but I'll update you as soon as I find out.....I am slightly wary seeing as she has a few open sores, about 10 biker tattoos and, as Groucho Marx said, "I wouldn't belong to any club that would have me." Also, I may or may not have told her I work as a trader for a big hedge fund.

Interesting things:

KRY looks like it's about to make a big move one way or the other.....I could be a thousandaire by this time next week.

There is currently a hunger strike going on on campus.....a prof who was denied tenure is protesting the decision claiming it was motivated by racism......very big news around these parts.

I went to Foxwoods resort and casino this weekend for the second time with some friends. It was much more fun this time as I won $2 instead of losing hundreds. Hand of the day:

I'm in the big blind with 6s 4s. Two callers, the small blind completes, I check. The flop comes 2, 3, 5....all spades! I yell "Oooooh yeaaahhh!!!", simultaneously fart, pump my fist, burp, pee my pants, and start giggling like a little girl on THC.

Everybody takes one look at me and folds. The dealer asks me to leave the table and clean myself off. I do, but not before accidentally crapping my pants and passionately kissing the 64 year old lady to my right. She slapped me, to which I only have 3 words in response: "TOTALLY WORTH IT"